Fall

Just a few pix of the boys this fall... they are getting so very very big and are all in different stages. I love them so much!

Old Appetites

So, I'm learning some things this year... 2008 is my year of learning, I think. I'm almost 35. I think this must be the time in life where we decide, this is who I am, and everyone else can deal with it. For me, it has become more, this is why I am free from who I used to be, and am more myself than ever before.

Here's a quote that caught my attention, at bible study, of course. Talking about the wilderness and what God says to us when we are grumbling through it... "I have shown you my presence again and again. I have intervened on your behalf with signs and wonders. I have healed your bitter water and have led you to the palms. I have also let you go hungry so that you would know who it is who feeds you. Now I will put you through the hardest test of all: I will let you grow accustomed to my presence. I will feed you from my table daily and prove who you really are. Will you grow in awe, or will you grow cold?"

Wow. Who am I? God is proving to me and is giving me the opportunity to respond to him in the amazing provisions he has given me.

So, songs... always in my head. This one particularly today...

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases.

His mercies never come to an end.

They are new every morning, new every morning.

Great is thy faithfulness O Lord. Great is thy faithfulness.

Today I am standing in awe. Tomorrow I might fail, but today I am in awe.

If you're reading this, you are already blessed beyond what you can dream... you have a computer and the means to read something online. You have time to sit and read it. I have time to sit and write it. We are blessed. This is abundance. My old appetite would say, I want more than I have. I need "this" to feel happy. I want "that" so I can "appear" like I'm doing good to others. However, the truth is this... I am who I am because God has filled up the old parts with new. He has created and treasured me enough to want me as his own. And I have asked him to come and be between me and what hurts. I have asked him to open the eyes of my heart so I can really see... and then to have the courage to face what's there. And he's for sure, without a doubt, doing that right now today...

Extremely, overwhelmingly, thankful.