Christmas Updates...

boys

I love candy. That's the only reason I allow the boys to get dressed up and go trick or treating... that and we know most folks where we stop by. Anyway, now that I have a baby inside me, and a 95% chance of having gestational diabetes again, I can't have it anyway. So, last night was for them, and their candy search! Owen wanted Jr. Mints for breakfast. I talked him into a banana first. It's going to be a long couple of weeks before we get rid of it all!

Faith in Troubles

1 Thessalonians 3:2,5
We sent Timothy to strengthen you, to encourage you in your faith, and to keep you from becoming disturbed by the troubles you were going through...I sent Timothy to find out whether you faith was still strong. I was afraid the tempter had gotten the best of you...

Ever been in the middle of something really hard? Where you had to sit back and watch horrible things, not being able to do one thing about it. Where the control of what was happening was completely out of your hands, and you can't do anything to make it better?

I'm in the middle of that right now, and let me tell you as frankly as possible, it sucks. I am coming unglued.

And then I come across these verses this morning, where Paul is asking the church, how strong are you? Even in troubles? I am sending Timothy to find out.

We can say we love God, we believe in his strength and power, etc.... but in the middle of the crisis, where the rubber meets the road so to speak, I am convicted by the weakness of my faith.

I am astonished by my own desire to fix it all, and not give it all to my Father... who is in complete power and control. I am perplexed by my faithlessness and inability to trust him in this process. I thought I was stronger....

So, today I go before God with weakness. Broken and unable to do anything without his divine intervention. Unable to be whoever he needs me to be without a pouring out from him. Me alone today is weak, fragile, hurt, angry, and quite scared.

Our God is a God of peace, not confusion. Apart from him, we can do nothing. I need His power, healing, and strength... to give me faith in the process of learning to trust.

Been awhile

Well, I guess life has gotten in the way of my blogger time! It has been an amazing, overwhelmingly busy week.

First of all, a higlight...

It was VBS week at our church, and our theme was about construction and building your life on a firm foundation. Just as we were learning that all things built by man eventually crumble and fall, our very own 35W bridge was collapsing. An incredible reminder that there is no other foundation other than Jesus Christ. He is the only rock that will stand the test of time. While it was bitter sweet, it was a valuable lesson for our kids this week.

Second, thankfulness...

My children and I crossed the 35W bridge twice on Wednesday on our way up to the Roseville Archiver's to deliver some samples. It is a route I take often, as well as Brian. While we are thankful for God's divine protection, we also continue to pray for those suffering because of this tragedy. I told Brian just tonight, this family, the people in our lives, are more important in this life than anything else. It was and is a reminder to be thankful.

Finally, transitions...

I have been hired by a photographer to assist her occasionally. This is an incredible learning opportunity for me and I can't wait to soak it all up! AND, our Richfield home, where we've spent several years of happiness and love, will be officially on the market Monday morning. Our new adventure begins! While we don't exactly know how it will all turn out, we are hoping that we will be able to build a home in Farmington this winter. Many things have to happen in a certain order for this to become our reality. We trust our heavenly Father during this time of change. We are mostly moving to Brian's parent's home in Eden Prairie this weekend, so that we can have our house in "showable" condition whenever it needs to be. Having a crazy busy life and two boys makes us living here while showing a home a real challenge. We are fortunate that Brian's parents have an empty house in EP...

The boys are healthy and happy, and we couldn't be more blessed.

Cait's Words

My dear girl, Caitlyn, is a beautiful and talented musician. She has a song on her new cd called Crushed and Created, and it has touched me over and over again...


here are some of the lyrics...

"we are crushed and created

we are melted and made

we are broken and built up in the very same way

what I thought I could handle

what I thought I could take

what I thought would destroy me

leaves me stronger in it's wake

I'm not the me that I started with

my friends say, my eyes are brighter

I'm not the me that I started with

I'm free-er

and I'm wiser

and I'm stronger... "

just a really good reminder, that what appears to be broken, is indeed just in transition.

God is amazing.

Coming Soon!

My very own website with all things photography in mind...
My pal KDog is working on it for me, and you can check it out shortly.
for now, check out my logo...
Cool, heh!

The Call...

Romans 11:29 says this... "for God's gifts and his call are irrevocable." (NIV)

My "call" happened somewhere between 11th grade and college at a place called Inspiration Point... why Bible Camps should be number one on the list of things parents should do with their kids each summer. As God did an extreme 180 on my own heart at this little peninsula in central Minnesota, so it is my prayer that my son will experience the same miracles. And in fact, he is doing so. Each summer is a new step of growth for his young heart.

My confirmation of the "call" came while doing a bible study with a bunch of ladies who where triple my age mostly called "Experiencing God." A must for every believer.

And ever since then, I can't shake it. Just feeling the refining process from the potter mostly.

Lately, I've been somewhat frustrated with the call. I kind of want to trade it in for something new, but God's not letting me. He continues to pursue and reinforce, and I continue to not be able to shake it.

What's interesting to me is that the call doesn't change even when the circumstances of your service become complicated. For example, when a leader gets all broken by sin... and has to step down. If the heart is open, God then begins a process called restoration... to the same call. Remember, the gifts and the call are irrevocable. The Message bible says it this way, "God's gifts and God's call are under full warrenty--never canceled, never rescinded." So what happens, if the heart is open, is that God says something like this, "OK, you messed up. Let me heal you so I can use you again." He does! My life is a testimony to this.

OR, how about when you serve under an oppressive leader? Your automatic response might be to just quit. Duh, right? The leader is oppressive so walk away! Not necessarily. God's gifts and his call are irrevocable. A wise friend of mine once told me that you can't leave a place unless God opens a door for a new place and leads you to it. Sure you can try to make the doors fly open, but God will shut them if it's YOU doing the moving and not him moving you. Who do you serve? The oppressive leader or a mighty God? Who do you respond to when he calls? The oppressive leader or you Father? The KING OF KINGS and LORD OF LORDS?

So, I sit before you tonight, all three of you who read this, cemented to this call. I can't shake it. I can't walk away from it. I can't leave it. It is who I am and by the grace of God, I will remain.

Somebody get me a latte! Make it a triple.

Lawn Watering Made Easy

How to water your lawn and keep your two squirrelly boys busy while you weed the garden and water the flowers?

Give them the hose.

There's not much better than the hysterical laughter of these two awesome kids.

Fuzzy Discovery

We've been out in the yard more lately, and Mr. O has discovered some interesting creatues in our front yard... like birdies and squirrels, and today, a fuzzy caterpillar. Check out these awesome pictures of the half an hour infatuation with the "capperpepper" like O says.

Later, we set him free in a nearby tree, and for the next half hour, there were frequent visits to see if he was still there! Oh the excitement of being two and finding the joys in new discoveries.

It makes me remember that life's a blast!

Pots, flowers, seeds and soil.

Isaiah 64 says this, "O Lord, you are our father. We are the clay. You are the potter. We are the work of your hands."

I've been getting my hands dirty in the soil of my yard, and at the same time, God's got his potter hands on my heart.

Isn't it an amazing relief to know that we are being shaped by our potter? Along the same lines, I have been thinking about the soil of my heart, what's planted there, and how it's growing. God's doing some cool things with me... I am anxious for the flowers to bloom.

Here's my shout out to the new baby Caden, on his way as I write!

Blessings on your pot today. May you be resting in your potter's hands.

Vacation: Get there...

If you haven't had one lately, it's time. I say this because, we are on one right now. It's heaven. I don't ever want to leave... but alas, we do have to go back to the real world sooner or later. I don't want to talk about that though.

Here's the highlights...
laying in the sun, watching O jump into the pool and not be afraid, seeing Brady laugh so hard he about keeled over, and the sheer joy of just being, as a family. Good stuff. We've done nothing but eat, relax, sleep and have fun.
This is so good for our minds, bodies, souls. Even though we're all sunburnt, we're happy. The real things in life are simple and good, and I've realized, I don't cherish them enough. We are blessed. So very very blessed.

My art

One of the most recent neon signs that God has been flashing at me is this: Shelly, You are an Artist. It's flashing in green neon, because green is my favorite color lately.

So, to honor God's flashing light, I have started an ART GROUP. Want to join? Here's what this means: Me and all the other artists out there get together to make art. For example, last Saturday morning my pal Lee and I photographed random things at the Farmer's Market. Of course, my favorite photo was not one I took at the Farmer's Market, but one I took while getting back into the car with my 2 year old. He's a feisty little fella and wouldn't obey his mommy by standing next to the car. Instead, he had to go check out the chain link fence in front of our car and ... the perfect shot appeared right before my eyes. I love photography.

Did you know that there are churches out there who have "artist groups" and communities of people who just hang out and do art stuff together? Now, that's cool. My church doesn't have this, but I'm going to start this. Heck, I'll even be the "art pastor." How's that?

When I grow up, I am going to be a photographer. Like that's all I'm going to do with myself is take pictures. I have decided that when "they" wrote all the books on spiritual gifts, "they" forgot to add visual arts. This, I believe, may indeed be my strongest spiritual gift. Capturing God's creation and the beauty my eyes behold is not only a priceless thing, but also a service to others. So, anytime I have to fill out something or tell someone what my spiritual gifts are, I usually list visual arts while they look at me with blank stares. They don't get it. That's OK. When we get to heaven and there is beautiful art beyond what our eyes can imagine or see, they'll remember me and smile. And I will smile back.

Easter again...

So, Easter has come and gone again. It's one of those holidays that should bring me joy as a Christian, but it only wears me out. From the kids singing in church, to new outfits, to baskets, and eggs... I sometimes get tired of the rat race our culture has made out of holidays. We had a nice meal at home, with several friends over, and then we all laid down for a long afternoon nap. Rest. In my opinion, all holidays should be like this. Eat and rest. Of course, we succumbed to the worldy tradition of coloring eggs and hiding them in our yard for our two year old to find. Even though he went to church that morning, I am pretty sure his best Easter memory will be finding those darned eggs. It's all backwards. I am considering skipping it next year. Not church, but eggs.

Recently, I have been reading up on fasting, and on taking the Sabbath day and keeping it holy. This has been good for me to continue to grow to understand. There's something about being intentional for God... some amazing thing that He meets us right in our stuff and blesses us through the process. I'm thankful for these things I don't understand completely, because even though it's a learning process and I'm a bit of a skeptic on all things, it's better to fast and rest than color Easter eggs and hide them in your yard. One is spiritual exercise, the other, well... just fluffy stuff in my opinion. And in the end, does the fluffy stuff I invest in really matter?

I'm going to do a church wide fast with my church. I'm not going to tell you when or where, though, because the Bible is clear that we are to fast in secret and that we are to even go out of our way to look good during a fast so no one knows we're starving ourselves, or in a period of deprivation. I've never done a fast for more than 24 hours. And I've never done one with a bunch of others at the same time. But, I'm going to do it. Not because they want me to, but because I'm curious to see what God will do with my heart during the time. I'll let you know what happens.

Make it a triple shot, please.

Latte, anyone?
I have a confession to make. I love lattes. Now, I'm not the worshipper of food. Although I do believe food is probably one of the greatest things God invented! It's so amazing what you can do with it and the ways we can create it to be so pleasing. Weird. Anyway, I do love lattes a great deal. Yes.

So, here's my question of the day. When I am emotionally heavy, or feeling a little blue (which is a lot lately because of my blue phase) the only real pick me up this earth can offer me is a latte. I like to add flavors too, either vanilla or carmel. Whipped cream is a must. Who can drink a hot beverage without it, really? But, what is it? Why does this immediately lift my spirits and make me happy, even for one small second? My best friend laughs at me when I take my first sip of coffee and say, "Thank you Jesus!" And this morning, when I was ordering my latte with a gift card I got, the "barista" said, "would you like any pastries or food with that?" I laughed and replied, "Coffee is my food, silly!" He also laughed and said, "absolutely!"

So, on to the other idea that lead to me buying a latte. My friend, Pamela, and I make fun of this rubber stamp they sell at this mega scrap booking monopoly we used to work at. It says, "Be Happy." We think it's about the dumbest thing to put on a stamp and then to place on a card that is possible. (NOTE: Please do NOT send me a card that says "Be Happy.")Maybe there's some psycho-babble that might support this statement as being accurate, but really, happiness is not something we choose. We just are, or we just aren't. I know for me, on days when I have said, "OK girl, pull up your bootstraps and be happy, dang it," it doesn't necessarily make me happy.

What makes me happy is a latte. And the sound of my children laughing together. Or the sight of my tulips peaking out in spring. Or the silence of freshly fallen snow. Or watching cheerleaders work really hard on TV. OR, even better, when I see it in the eyes of one of the kids I work with that they are understanding and receiving God's love. Now, that makes me happy. And all of those things, (children, tulips, snow, cheerleaders, God's love...) those are kind of unpredictable. It just happens, and viola! I am blessed.

So, here's what I've decided. Happiness is a blessing. When you have it and feel it, cherish it. It's God knocking on your door and saying hi. When you don't, then a triple shot carmel latte is in order friend, make it extra on the whipped cream.

Getting it Out.

So, I'm feeling the need to write again. I say again because I used to write all the time. Like 10 years ago I'd fill up a journal in a couple of months. I would write and write. I don't exactly know why I stopped... maybe I got busy... kids, and such. Maybe I didn't want to say what I was thinking? Denial of truth is a powerful deception. Whatever the reason, I'm ready now. To post thoughts. Have them be out there forever.

I recently read an entire book. I know this might sound like no small feet to most of you, but I get bored really easy. I am ambitious as I start many books a year, believing that they all will change me after I'm done reading them. Usually by about chapter 4 or 5 I'm bored. Either the writing isn't creative enough to hold me or the content is something predictable that I've already heard, or I just get bored with it. Anyway, this recent book impressed me a great deal. I read it from cover to cover in about 3 days. I couldn't put it down. It's called "Blue Like Jazz" by Donald Miller.

So, now I am hereby declaring myself in a blue phase. The "influenced by Donald Miller" blue phase. This book, I do believe, did change my heart. There is some supernatural holy spirit hold on it. The way I have been thinking my whole life has finally been put to words for me! Thanks, Don. I even underlined things in this book, which for me, really means there's something there worth remembering. I am going to read it a second time after I let the first amazement soak in a while.

Someone told me a couple of days ago that this book was popular awhile back. That's so me. To catch up later on something everyone else already knows. Anyway, whoever knows or doesn't know, this book is a must read. Like it will go in various places in my house. I will buy multiple copies. I have at least two friends in mind that I am going to send it to. It's that good. It's right on... a direct hit.

Maybe it's because of Donald Miller that I must write again. Whatever the case, here I am. Getting my thoughts out.